Control-Freakism

Control-Freakism is a disease that floods our nation.  As a currently diagnosed carrier of control-freakism I ponder it's roots and the possible ways to rid myself of its havoc in my life.  Day after day I quiver at its ugly face filled with disillusionment of control and command.  To think I hold in my hand enough power to move the very environment around me to please my every whim is rather audacious and absolutely ludicrous.  Where do I start to break free from control-freakism?  How do I live without stressing over minute details of display or minor punctures in my plans?

Let go. 

Two words that hold so much weight.  Releasing the grip of five fingers to let self granted control fly away forever frees stress of perfection. You see, my fellow sufferers, we are to not be anxious. Everything we do ought to be dressed in prayer, allowing God, the one who does hold the reigns of control, to be just that, in control.  Not only this, but we must come to Him with gratitude, understanding that He has a greater plan and can do more than we could as his creation (Phil 4:6).  Let go of minor details, what color shirt you ware today, and rather be thankful you have clothes to ware.  Let go of trivial obscurities such as each pencil being sharpened to a point and each paper equally aligned with the others in your trays at work and be thankful you have a place to work.  Or what about the restaurant being out of your favorite dish, your car not working, your computer crashing.  Things will happen outside of our control everyday.  The wind will blow your perfectly parallel papers into a chaotic stack of sheets and the question is how will you deal with it.  Be thankful for something about that situation and pray God gives you the grace to be at peace.  Let's end this epidemic of control-freakism and move forward into a healthy reality understanding that we aren't in command.

Claustrophobia

Claustrophobia sends me running out the door.
This crashing down of walls and
pushing in of the air forces me to step outside and run into the wild.
Off I go,
down the street.
Not
       stopping
                    until
                           I
                             feel
the freedom of the flowing air fresh against my skin
and the whisper of it's melody.
Gently the breeze swims by,
sweeping me into its safety.

Crashing walls and choking air I have oppressed.
Without walls I well up with courage
to return to my center of stress and rumble with my phobia.
Grapple it to the ground I will.
Humble this silly space in my head,
clearing what was never filled as I
open my eyes to see no open space
or feel no blowing breeze.

Never had I left my tiny terror.
Merely had I sat frozen to it's tundra floor
as it took me with frost until numbness fell on me.
Good bye small space!
Farewell fictitious phobia playing in my mind!

Changing Lanes

What a world we live in where drivers don't pay attention to what is going on around them.  While on the road, taking a weekend trip to get away, there was the usual Pennsylvania back up due to construction on the turnpike.  As my wife and I sat there, we watched as drivers tried to swerve into the other lane just to see ahead, meanwhile someone is sitting in that lane waiting to move forward.  Those with whom we shared the road had little to no regard for the flow of traffic, or lack there of.  Trying to alleviate some of this pressure and seeing a car that needed to merge into the left lane, as the right was drawing to an end, I slowly backed away to allow this fellow driver room to fall into line.  What I find humorous in this situation, is that in his frustraion, he did not pay attention to the opening that was being given to him.  Instead he focussed on pushing in no matter what.  In fact we saw this driver swerve into the left lane almost colliding with an SUV.  Ironically that SUV is one of the vehicles that longed to see what was ahead and almost collided with me while I was in opposite lanes.  I digress.  As the two almost slowed the traffic pattern even more with a near collision, I couldn't help but think about a previous blog of mine.  As Christians we sometimes know where God wants us to go, the signs seem to show us that a door might be closing so we try to change lanes.  But instead of waiting on His timing and His will, we hop on our one will.  He has a gap ready for us to merge into His lane and follow His plan, but we have to wait just a few more seconds.

Strength Through It All

Once we all wake up we will be entering a day to remember.  Almost anyone can recall where they were when our nation was rattled a mere ten years ago.  This weekend has been filled with services and ceremonies, moments of silence and patriotic music as we draw together as a nation to stand strong.  Having heard a first hand testimony from one who survived the attack on our nation I have been humbled.  Some may give reasons as to why it was allowed to happen to America.  Some may say this is why we must support our troops, in order to protect our borders and our freedoms.  Though I agree that we should support those who willingly sacrifice the comfort and luxuries risking their lives in order to protect this great nation, whether be through the police or fire departments or a branch of the military, that is not my purpose tonight.  As I heard this testimony I was reminded that all things fade.  Nations will rise and fall, but the God who created this world will not.  He sits on His throne today as He has from day one and will to the very end.  The Bible says that "The name of the LORD is a strong tower; the righteous man runs into it and is safe" (Proverbs 18:10).  Whatever happens in the political, military, economic or social environments of this world, God is the strong tower.  He has always and will always be the King of the Universe, with whom strength and security lies.  I love this nation and feel blessed to call myself an American, but I feel even more blessed to call myself a Christian for my true home is in heaven.

Faith Like Daniel

Two weeks in a row now, at two different churches and from two different preachers, my wife and I have heard sermons based out of Daniel 6.  This particular chapter of the Bible is about the famous "Daniel and the Lions Den" that many of us who were raised in Sunday School have heard.  I feel that God is trying to tell me something but I'm not quite sure what.  Being in the situation, hearing the same thing from two different men twice has put my mind in motion to praying and think about what it is God is trying to say.  Still not sure if there is anything deeper than simply driving home a point, God has revealed to me lesson in which I think we all could learn from.  Daniel was saved from the mouths of the lions because of his faith.  As a result the king praised God, the God of Daniel for who He is!  What if Daniel wasn't as faithful?  Not just in that moment but throughout his life.  When he was first taken into captivity by the Babylonians he was faithful and didn't want to "defile himself with the king's food." (Daniel 1:8).  Daniel was also faithful when he interpreted the dreams for king Nebuchadnezzar for the glory of God! (Daniel 2).  He continually went to God throughout the day to pray while under king Darius (Daniel 6:10).  What if he wasn't faithful?  Maybe he wouldn't have been in such a predicament, but then he would not have had so many opportunities to build his relationship with God as he was shown such incredible love by God.  Maybe the king wouldn't have had the chance to see the mighty and miraculous hand of God in Daniel's life which he, king Darius, then turned back to praise for God.  This is what I have been thinking about.

So often the younger generation of Christians are looking for what God has in store for our lives and we want to make such a great impact for Him.  But in our blindness to His plans, we only see the end and what all we want to do for God.  So often we miss the opportunities throughout our life to show our faithfulness towards our God and go day by day with Him.  We are His servants and ultimately our story is His story.  Our lives are not about us but about Him.  My goal for myself is to keep a keen eye for opportunities, small or large, to show my love for the LORD and faithfulness to my God and I challenge you to do the same.  Look for these opportunities in the now, not just for where you think God is ultimately taking you.

The Blogging Begins!

Here it is guys, my first official blog.  I have been told by a few people for the last few years that I should put my thoughts into a blog so here it goes.  My goal is simple, let you know what's on my mind.  Hopefully through my life and my thoughts you may see Christ if you are not a Christian, and if you are I hope you'll get to know Him better.  There is no direction of my writing, just the thoughts that tend to float into my head late into the night when I'm unwinding from the day.  This is usually when some of my best reflecting takes place.  Tonight my musings have been stretched to their limit just trying to figure out what to call my blog.  And I may change it since someone out there actually has this title already.  No I didn't steal it from them, whoever they are.  The name landed in my head and I typed it as my possible url, and I was told it was already taken.  If anyone has any ideas for what I should call this blog please let me know.  For now, and maybe forever, Musings at Midnight it remains.  Until my next post, have a wonderful weekend wherever you are and don't forget to get up and go to Church in the morning.  I'm going to bed so I can actually wake up to get there. God bless and good night!